Day 5 – Battling the Snooze Button

📅 Day Count Check-In

Five days down, ninety-five to go. Today started off with the heroic intent of waking up at 4:30 AM, only to be immediately sabotaged by my greatest enemy—the snooze button. One blink and it was 8 AM. Epic fail, indeed. Still, instead of spiraling into existential dread (tempting as it was), I dragged my reluctant ass to the gym for 30 solid minutes of cardio.

@rewiredwithdrew

Day 5 of trying not to be a fat add and somehow my laundry has unionized, my house is judging me, and I’ve convinced myself learning Japanese is “relaxing”. If you’re also spiraling with purpose, the new blog post might hit a little too close to home. Links in the bio. Misery is more fun in a group! #100dayschallenge #selfdeprecatingfitness #gixyourlife #semaglutidejourney #fatasschronicles #laundrywars #realliferant #japaneselearning #trtdiaries #bloglife #relatableaf #housechaos #nomotivationclub #day5challenge

♬ original sound – RewiredWithDrew

🎌 Lost in Translation

Midway through treadmill purgatory, I dove into Lesson 5 of Pimsleur’s Japanese. Update: I can officially ask someone if they’re hungry, thirsty, or hopelessly lost. Practical? Perhaps on some future trip to Japan. Until then, I’ll file this skill under “obscure party tricks.”

Yesterday, I was in a Twitter space and confidently said, “Ohayō gozaimasu,” hoping to impress. Someone immediately responded with a rapid-fire burst of Japanese—or so I thought. As panic set in and my brain froze, I suddenly realized he was simply rattling off Japanese car manufacturers (“Toyota, Honda, Mitsubishi…”) with an impeccable accent. Once I called him out, he laughed and conceded the act. Lesson learned: fake it till you make it, or until someone calls you on your bullshit.

🍽️ Introducing: Tabemasin (“I’m Not Eating”)

Let’s talk semaglutide. Supposedly this GLP-1 wonder drug was going to nuke my hunger and leave me blissfully indifferent to food—or at least that’s what Audrey told me. Spoiler: not quite. I’m not nauseated, not sick to my stomach, and not revolted by the idea of eating. In fact, last night I was hangry—like snappy, irritable, ready-to-start-a-fight-with-the-dog hangry—until I finally caved and ate my salad.

That said, something is happening. I’m not craving junk or constantly thinking about food, and I definitely feel like I’m operating on fewer calories without the usual gnawing hunger monster lurking. So maybe it’s working… just not in the dramatic, Instagram-influencer way I was led to believe.

🎬 Movie Theater Inflation and Minecraft Charades

Speaking of cinema-induced financial despair, last night’s family outing was brought to you by Trump-tariff inflation, totaling roughly $300 USD with food and popcorn and drinks. At that price, you’d at least expect Jason Momoa to personally apologize for the bad acting.

📚 Duolingo’s Hiragana Magic

Last night before I collapsed into unconsciousness, I hit a quick Duolingo session to keep the Japanese streak alive. Hiragana is finally clicking in a way that doesn’t feel like complete nonsense. I’m starting to recognize characters and not just pretend I do while panicking internally.

In a moment of pure impulse (or maybe anime-fueled hope), I ordered a One Piece manga in Japanese after binging the Netflix adaptation. It’s currently sitting on my desk, judging me. I cracked it open once, saw a wall of kanji and katakana, and quietly muttered “まだまだです” (mada mada desu)—which roughly translates to “yeah, I’m not even close.”

⚡ Body Check-in

Today, surprisingly, feels a little less miserable. I’m less sore, notably more energetic, and substantially less cranky. On the downside, my sex drive is still AWOL, but here’s hoping yesterday’s TRT test proves helpful in that delicate arena.

Let’s talk about the scale for a second. I’ve been weighing myself daily, and here’s the truth: the scale is a filthy liar. One day you’re down, the next you’re up two pounds, and it’s not because you inhaled a cake in your sleep (probably). Don’t get discouraged by the noise. Just make sure you’re using the same scale, at the same time of day, ideally under the same conditions—consistency is king. The trend is what matters, not the daily chaos.

Water retention, glycogen, muscle inflammation, your mood, and maybe even planetary alignment all screw with the number. Stay the course.

Speaking of, I take my next dose of semaglutide on Monday and will be doing all my measurements again. I’m hoping for good news… or at least something hilariously embarrassing to share. This one won’t include progress pics, sorry. I know—tragic.

🗓️ Calendar Worship / Calendar Chaos & Life Hacks

I’m always saying there’s just not enough time in the day—and I’m not wrong. Dishes are piling up like I’m running a one-man diner. Laundry? Forget it. I’ve got blinds still in boxes waiting for their day in the sun (literally), and random chores lurking in every corner. I could be knocking those out instead of blogging… but where’s the fun in that?

To salvage what little sanity I have left, we did make a few moves. I hired a house cleaner to come once a week for $179—worth every damn penny. It doesn’t fix the chaos, but it gives me a clean surface to spiral out on. As for laundry, I ditched Poplin’s pickup service. It was great… until the only person in my area started prioritizing her own side hustle and returned our stuff late, stained, and smelling like betrayal. So now I haul it to the laundromat myself—less convenient, but cheaper and somehow less infuriating. Honestly, outsourcing laundry is the closest thing I’ve found to a real life cheat code.

Frankly, my schedule looks like someone tried to cram a month’s worth of tasks into 24 hours: working out, actual work, family walks, meal prepping (yes, me!), and attempting fluency in Japanese. Google Calendar is officially my new deity. All hail productivity!

📖 Today’s Book Recommendation

Since David Goggins, “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck,” and “Atomic Habits” are already off your reading list, here’s something genuinely fresh:

“Unfu*k Yourself: Get Out of Your Head and into Your Life” by Gary John Bishop.

Why this book? It’s blunt, snarky, and directly aligned with the spirit of this challenge—helping you get out of your own way, stop self-sabotage, and make actual progress. It’s a perfect companion for those epic snooze-button battles.

🔊 Conclusion: Join the Madness!

Honestly, at times I feel like I’m yelling into a void, which might actually be for the best considering how embarrassingly vulnerable all this is. But misery loves company, and I need more people fed up with their fat-ass ways to join me on this wild ride. So go ahead, take the plunge, and join our community. Leave a comment below and let me know what you think—about snooze buttons, movie theater salads, or your own struggles. Share this challenge on your socials, because collective insanity is better than solitary suffering. Let’s do this madness together!